Twin Possible

My name is Shelly from a suburban town in Long Island, N.Y.  I wish I could say Marco Island, Florida, but sadly.. I cannot.  I fell into the love of writing at about 11 years of age. Unfortunately, most of that was depressing poetry and morbid diary entries, as my world fell into turmoil at around that time.  The loss of the grandmother who raised me at 11, dealing with my dysfunctional family (ongoing), and then dealing with extreme bullying throughout my junior high and high school years.  Not to mention a horribly abusive relationship along the way that I am very lucky to have survived.
I lost someone whom was what I thought to be the love of my life and ex-fiancee, working our way back to fiancee again in 1996 in a most devastating way.  Then in the next decade, by far the worst loss of my life, the passing of my almost 10 year old son.  His life was full of pain and smiles, and running in and out of hospitals, but never is a day that goes by that I am not thankful for having had him in my life.  Yes..I have seen tragedy, but I have also seen the good in life, the little things, and the good in people…well most of them. *SMILE.*
Writing has always been an outlet that I am sure helped save me from drugs and alcohol..POSSIBLY even suicide during my younger years especially, though I did dabble in the second ‘socially’ but TOO much, for a brief period.  I don’t blame myself for that.  It was part of my growing up and lesson learning.  I think sometimes we need to learn lessons the hard way.  Not only does it help us learn the err of our own ways, but it also helps us reflect that experience we have taken from it and present it to our children so they won’t, (more likely anyway), make the same mistakes.  I’m very open and honest with my kids.  I am mom 1st, but friend a close 2nd.  I don’t care what anybody has to say about that.  My mom was never a friend to me and I always craved that so badly. I think there needs to be a balance, and there needs to be respect, but it’s doable.
I am the mom to 4 children living: 18 month old twin girls that still keep me up at night, a 14 year old son who is such a great kid, and a 6 year old diva that at times makes me want to rip all my hair out, but is an exceptionally bright and energetic child.  Yes, that may translate into hyper, but nevertheless…  My eldest son passed 6 years ago, and I also have lost two other angels along the way on my trying to conceive journey for numbers 3 and 4.  I certainly never planned nor expected it to be #’s 4 AND 5, and I’ll admit I was actually upset when I found out I was having twins.  How would I afford it?  How would we manage it as a couple?  How would I not end up in a sanitarium rocking back and forth?  How would my body come out of it?  Sorry to be superficial sounding, but it is a common worry I have since learned while blogging.  I will say now, I have NO regrets!  This was God’s master plan.  I believe that..NOW, but it took awhile to scrape me and hubby off of the floor, that’s for damn sure.
I lost touch with writing since my daughter was born 6 years ago.  I did do some poetry writing for my son but I really wanted to do more.  I have successfully incompleted 3 books I was working on.. HA HA.  I have made myself a promise that I will do that and soon.  At least finish 1.  Finding time is tough, especially now, but I got back into writing through creating my blog Twinpossible.  That much I am proud of as I have stuck with it now for a year and several months.  I said if I survive twins, body, mind, and soul, I am going to spread the positive word because my whole pregnancy I read about so much negativity online, that I think more light needed to be shed honestly, about the other side of things.  (Though my blog does talk about topics for ANY parent, whether twins or not.  I try and be versatile.)  It’s very therapeutic for me.
I thank you so much for giving me the spotlight.  Jenn is an amazing woman.  A super mom/ blogstress.  I am proud to be featured here!